Self-imposed spending bans vs those due to circumstances

Lately I've been reading a lot about self imposed shopping/spending bans (by the way, I think they are to blame for my record poor eBay sales).

I find it very interesting to read about participants' grand objectives with respect to undertaking a ban only to read weeks later that they purchased x (but it doesn't count because a voucher was used) or they purchased y (but it doesn't count because it was an item that was on their wish list for months if not years).  I giggle to myself but then think - I've been there and done that! I can totally relate and at times it's almost as if I am reading about my very own shopping ban attempts.

So yes, I too have tried to put myself on a shopping ban on many occasions. I've even written about my different shopping philosophies and strategies HERE and HERE and HERE. Although I have loosely succeeded in changing the way that I shop, when it comes to shopping bans, I have failed miserably.

Self-imposed spending bans

I could never really figure out why maintaining not shopping was such an issue for me?  It's only now, with the purchase of our new home (yes, settlement when smoothly) and the responsibility of servicing three mortgages between my boyfriend and I, that the penny has dropped as to the reasons for my past failures.

The reasons are as follows:
  1. I have always been dissatisfied with the contents of my wardrobe - there's always a piece or two missing.  Upon buying those two pieces, I realise that there are another one or two pieces missing.
  2. I will refrain from saying that I like to shop (because I seldom make a day of it), but I do love bargain hunting. This usually occurs in short spates in my lunch break. Let me tell you, a lot can be purchased during a lunch break, and multiple bargains soon add up to a mountain of money.
  3. Until recently I could afford to shop like a maniac (read: go crazy during sale times and make single expensive purchases).
  4. I have had no reason to budget until now, meaning that my level of disposable income was high. This of course leads to disposable purchases, in the sense that one starts behaving like a spoiled child with too many toys... you wear it once and then toss it in the corner.
Does this sound like you? If not, then why do you think that you have failed in your shopping/spending ban?

Spending bans due to circumstances

To say that being faced with the challenge of servicing three mortgages has changed the way I view spending my money and the true necessity of my possessions (more to do with having to pack them than anything else) would be the understatement of the century!

There are two ways I could go now:
  1. Not spend as much as I have in the past.
  2. Accumulate a massive credit card debt in order to maintain my unrestricted lifestyle.
No prizes for guessing which path I plan to take and already I have noticed a mind shift in the way I approach shopping and spending money.

My first observation is that I have stopped buying things that I do not NEED.  This may seem like a no brainer, but I challenge you to think of the last 5 things you bought and ask yourself: "do I really need this or did I just want it?".

Take my last frivolous shopping spree (if you can even call it that) that I enjoyed in Melbourne - I bought 5 things and truth be told I don't need any of them.  Not to say that I will not use or wear my purchases or that I am not pleased with them - but I bought everything simply because I wanted it.  Needless to say, no more buying the latest moisturiser just because it sounds good and I want to try it, because for the time being I have enough moisturiser to turn the Sahara into an tropical oasis.

Secondly, I have noticed that the things that I do need (arguably) have become glaringly obvious.  I find myself looking out for this stuff and my vision is no longer obscured by the things I just want and buy first or buy because I like or buy just because I can. These items that I NEED have now become the only items that I plan to buy.

My third observation is that I have parked the necessary purchases until such time that the need for them truly arises. For example I really do need new layering tops (I have been saying this to myself for years now). Say I was hit by a bus tomorrow and my clothes required to be cut away from me in hospital - I would be embarrassed by what lies beneath.  But given it is Spring here in Oz, this much needed purchase can be shelved until such time that it is truly required and I will make do with what I have for now.

And last but not least - I have come to acknowledge to myself that am an extremely lucky woman. Not only can I still afford to buy what I need, but I already have a wardrobe full of lovely clothes that would make most women pretty happy. It's time to take advantage of this blessing.

So next time you go shopping and are considering the purchase of yet another bottle of pink nail polish or the 10th striped top to add to your collection - ask yourself DO I REALLY NEED THIS?  I mean really ask yourself this question.  Answer it for yourself.  Don't feel compelled not to buy the item just because your answer is no (because maybe your circumstances allow you to go crazy Broadway style and also I would hate for you to miss out on the bargain of the century), but don't be surprised if you walk away empty handed.

Here is a video of Bart and Millhouse going crazy - Broadway style. Enjoy.

  

18 comments:

  1. I went on a three-month shopping ban years ago, just to take stock of my shopping habits. Since then, I haven't imposed any further bans on myself, but I have become much more careful as far as my shopping is concerned. I gave away most of my wardrobe a couple of years back, and I find that owning less means I shop less, and when I do shop, I really appreciate what I acquire.
    Your current state of mind sounds very focused and content :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes I think taking stock every so often is very important... take my pantry for example: how on earth did I accumulate 3 jars of peanut butter?! Things can get out of hand if we don't stop to smell the roses every so often :)

      Delete
  2. I could relate too 100% of this post, although I only have one mortgage so haven't reeled in my spending as yet. Give me a few years and few mortgages and I'll be in the same boat at you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It really is a first world problem this issue of mine, isn't it? :)

      Delete
  3. i've stopped buying clothes because i know that absolutely nothing fits in my already tightly packed wardrobes. i have 3 of them. sigh! haha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Have you considered a cull or are you content with the state of your wardrobe?

      Delete
  4. Thank you so much for this lovely post! It is very refreshing to read someone's considered and thoughtful opinion on this topic, I constantly struggle with monitoring my own consumption and minimising spending/spending bans. I am so glad you have started posting regularly again!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for reading! I sometimes feel that I ramble around in circles. Hopefully one day what I'm trying to get across will make sense (to me too!).

      Delete
  5. I have to say that I keep asking myself if I need things all the time. And ahaha so guilty of buying things that were on a wishlist, it seems to be my rationale for most anything really. Already I'm contemplating the purchase of a couple things from ASOS, as the 20% off code is pretty tempting. Ahh I feel like I'm failing already haha. I have the idea for a new strategy but I'm not sure how well it's going to work... I'm glad that you have finally been able to curb your spending, even if it is due to a mortgage! xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Can't wait to hear/read about your new strategy if you decide to share it.
      Keep shopping if it makes you happy (and you can afford to) x

      Delete
  6. i had a self-imposed shopping ban on for awhile almost a year ago. i'd just given away over half my wardrobe and it felt really good. without all the clutter, i was getting dressed easier and without as much stress. really good. i kept it up for a good three months. at the end of the three months (it was an undefined period), i snapped up a pair of designer shoes that normally i would have never, ever considered due to price, mainly because for the first time I could afford to.

    AWESOME. :) that kind of cemented it for me, shop less, buy nicer things.

    i have my clothes shopping under control now (i don't "go shopping" and i don't really want for anything anymore), so i have turned my attention to my craft shopping, which i feel i am also getting better at. and my apartment looks nicer due to less stuff. :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sometimes I wish blogger had a like button :)

      It's great to read tales like yours.

      Delete
  7. this is a really interesting post! I'm kind of in the middle at the moment, where I need to be saving for something and I have a deadline (wedding, 1 year), but because I'm not outlaying money at the moment, apart from deposits, it's hard to put money away. I imagine being forced to pay for something regularly (like a mortgage) will no doubt bring about an effective shopping ban!

    I need to start thinking in terms of 'I could buy these 3 dresses, or I could pay for the flowers at the wedding'. perhaps then it will put things in context and I'll lose the will to shop.

    thanks for your insights as always x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What you write reminds me of when I was saving a deposit for my first home ... the money was hard to put away because there was no debt, but upon actually buying my first home I can honestly say that I wished I had saved more.
      Trust me in the lead up to your wedding as the supplier accounts fall due you will surely re-think those purple umbrella print pants. (I know you haven't bought pants with little umbrellas printed on them - you're much too stylish, but I'm just using them as an example to describe something you have recently bought which you could easily live without) x

      Delete
  8. I really like your honest post. I spend a ton on food and other knick-knacks but I drag my feet at having to fork out for essentials. It's not the big expenses that is the killer, it's the small ones that add up.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. yeah, we spend a lot on food too. One thing that I hope to implement once where settled in the new place are meals plans... boring but necessary.

      Delete
  9. I'm doing a similar thing - you might call it a self imposed ban but I think of it as a spending ban due to circumstances as I wish to get my loan debt out of the way so that I can contribute to a home with my partner. I have found it SO HARD to save any money at all that I have had to give myself goals and wish that I could just hand the reins to someone else and live happily on my $50 budget a week!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What you could do is organise your bank to pay split your wage straight into a savings account without an access card. This way you will have to physically log into your account to manually transfer money in order to spend it. I think you will find that you will think twice about spending your savings especially as you see the amount grow and set yourself higher goals. You could even turn it into a fun game maybe? :)

      Delete